


Don't Threaten Me With A Good Time

by softboystanley



Category: IT (2017)
Genre: Am I ashamed?, M/M, Yes., ben is on the chess team you cant change my mind, breif stenbrough, did i base this off a panic song?, hell no., mike is a quarterback you cant change my mind, richie is basically patrick from perks of being a wallflower in this, slowburn-ish?, the end is when an ace bitch tries her best, the stenbrough is me wanting to do a fuckboy bill ace stan au but not knowing how
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-01-20
Updated: 2019-01-20
Packaged: 2019-10-13 09:45:55
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,642
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17485832
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/softboystanley/pseuds/softboystanley
Summary: Richie Tozier knew everyone, that is until he met the new kid, Eddie, at a party and his entire night went to shit.





	Don't Threaten Me With A Good Time

**Author's Note:**

> i tried my best and do listen to p!atd while reading this 
> 
>  
> 
> (please let me know if u would wanted a fuckboy!bill ace!stan au in the future and ill try my best to find a concept)

Richie had no idea why he was at this trashy party but his night was going great. Yeah, the party might have sucked and yeah, the beer might have been cheap as shit and tasted like a bear’s asshole but it wasn’t that part of the party Richie liked. It was the people.

Richie Tozier was Derry High School’s biggest extrovert. He knew basically everyone from football players to the entire debate team. He couldn’t walk five feet without smiling at someone or greeting his friends because, everyone was his friend. He was a class clown that even the teachers enjoyed because even though he was making jokes in class he still got perfect grades. He was so loved in fact that no one really gave a shit that he was gay, well bi actually. When he came out most people shrugged their heads as if it was normal and went on with their business. 

That’s why this party was so interesting to him. Because even in the midst of familiar faces who he had roamed the school with, someone stood out. A smaller boy who Richie has never seen in his life. He had short brown hair that flopped around as he danced. His skin was soft and patterned with freckles that Richie could see, even at a distance. He was dancing with a girl and guy Richie knew pretty well. Beverly Marsh and Bill Denbrough. 

“Billiam and Bev. My two favorite social opposites.” Richie said as he sauntered over to them, really only wanting to talk to this mysterious stranger. 

“Beep Beep.” Bev said in response. ‘Beep Beep’ was an inside joke that everyone at the school knew although no one really remembered how it began. One day people just started saying beep beep in response to some of Richie’s, less than perfect, dad jokes. 

“Yowza, Bev. Just wanted to talk to my buds. How are you two on this fine night?” Richie turned to Bill, who was looking completely away from the conversation and at a floof of hair that rose above the crowd that could only belong to one person. “Billiam?” 

Suddenly, as if drawn back in from reality, Bill whipped his head around and faced Richie. 

“Yeah?” 

“How is your night?” 

“Fine.” Bill replied, monotone. Richie assumed that he was still fascinated by the puff of hair that danced around the horde of people. 

Richie sighed. “Are you gonna introduce me to your friend here or am I gonna have to do everything myself?” 

Bill had looked away, completely ignoring Richie, searching for the hair which had disappeared from the dancefloor. Richie instead looked to Bev with pleading eyes. She understood what he meant and presented her smaller companion. 

“Richie, meet Eddie. He just moved into the apartment above me and my dad.” Upon hearing his name, the smaller boy, presumably Eddie, turned to face Richie. 

“Richard Tozier, resident extrovert. It’s truly a pleasure to meet you.” 

“Eddie, uh, Kaspbrak.” Eddie Kaspbrak. Richie thought it over in his mind. He wasn’t the type to fall for someone easily but there was something about Eddie. Maybe it was his cute look and kind demeanor. Christ you’ve only been talking to him for a few minutes and here you are, completely swooning. 

“Cute.” Richie said. “Well if you ever need someone to show you around school, I’m your guy. I know everyone here.” Richie had just realized that he and Eddie had drifted away from Bill and Bev. 

“That guy over there, that’s Mike Hanlon. I call him Mikey. He’s the quarterback. Super nice guy.” Richie stopped to wave at Mike who nodded in return. 

“This over here is Ben Hanscom, captain of Derry High’s Chess Team, undefeated. He’s a bit of a nerd but I love him.” Richie rounded the corner and gave Ben a high five. 

“Remember distracted Bill earlier? That’s the cause, Stanley Uris, my bestest friend. Bill’s got the hots for him. Little secret, I’ll let you in on: Stan’s ace and Bill’s a tad bit of a fuck boy so that’s gonna be interesting.” 

The whole time Richie had been monologuing about his friends, Eddie was just nodding, occasionally snorting at some of the things Richie would say. 

“Oh stay away from him, that’s Henry Bowers. Quite edgy and mean. He’s racist, homophobic, whole nine yards.” Richie said. “Hey Henry!” He called before flipping him off and receiving the same in return. 

Richie had been showing Eddie all of his friends when he heard someone yell “POLICE!” and everything went to shit. He could see the blue and red lights bleed through the curtains illuminating the house. Eddie looked up to him, nervous. Richie grabbed his hand and ran through the back of the house and to the back door. 

“Where are we going?!” Eddie said before pulling his hand out of Richie’s. 

“Just trust me, okay? Ain’t my first time running from the cops.” Richie winked. Eddie rolled his eyes and grabbed Richie’s hand. 

“I trust you.” 

Richie wasted no time booking it into the woods. He would only look back to see if Eddie was still behind him. When the sound of sirens had finally faded away he stopped to catch his breath. 

“Think we’re in the clear?” Eddie asked in between breaths. 

“Probably.”

“Do you have any idea where we are?” 

Richie looked around. “Vaguely?” 

“Great. I’m trapped in the woods with a stranger.” 

“Hey! You just said that you trusted me. I’d say that’s a little more than strangers.” 

“So? I trust my waiter at Olive Garden. Doesn’t mean I want to get trapped in the woods with him.” 

Richie pretended to look offended, then he realized Eddie was serious. Then, he was actually offended. 

“Listen Eds-“ 

“Don’t call me Eds, it’s not my name.” 

“Fine, Edward. I’m the only reason you’re not in jail right now.” 

“What am I supposed to thank you? I could have gotten out of there myself. And I would know where the fuck I was.” 

“Wooooow. I said I knew where we were.” 

“‘Vaguely.’” Eddie did air quotes. 

“Over there is probably Castle Rock, and in that direction is Salem’s Lot, so Derry’s got to be this way.” 

“Derry is to the east of Castle Rock, correct?” Eddie looked down at his phone. 

“Yeah but-“ 

“Derry is this way, dipshit. Salem’s Lot is over there.” 

“Oh excuse me, I had no idea that I was talking to fucking Lewis and Clark.” 

“Lewis and Clark are two people. Hence the ‘and’ part.” 

Richie narrowed his eyes. “I’ve had it with you, honestly!” 

“Well it’s nice to know the feeling is mutual!” Eddie yelled back. 

“God! Why did I even talk to you!” 

“Cause your Mr-Fucking-Extrovert! Remember?!” 

Richie stepped back, his mouth agape. 

“At a loss for words there, trashmouth?!”

“Nope, the cops are behind you.” 

Eddie whirled around and was greeted by three uniformed officers. Richie put his hands up and surrendered, hoping to god that Eddie wouldn’t say something stupid and get them in trouble. 

“Hands behind your back!

“Dammit!” Eddie said, putting his hands up. “I blame you.” He mouthed at Richie who rolled his eyes in return.  
\----------------------------------------------------------------------- 

45 minutes later, Eddie and Richie were sitting in an interrogation room. An officer was sitting in front of them with a pen and a pad of paper. 

“That’s all I’m asking you to do. Just give me the names of the people you got the beer from.” 

“And for the millionth time, I don’t know!” Richie huffed. 

“Same here.” Eddie said. “I just moved here, I don’t know anyone.” 

“Oh really? Not even your friend over here?” 

“He is not my friend.” 

“I said I knew where we were!” 

“You went in the absolute wrong direction!” 

“Hey!” The cop clapped. “Just give me your names and we’ll call your parents.” 

“I’ve watched Law and Order. Don’t tell them anything, Eddie.” Richie said, before realizing his mistake. 

“Oh real nice going, Richie! Can you just shut up for five minutes?” 

“Alright, Richie and Eddie. If you’ll follow me to a cell.” 

The police officer stood up and lead Richie and Eddie to a holding cell. 

“Is there any way I could get one away from this dipshit?” Eddie pleaded. 

“Sorry, we’re full tonight.” 

Richie walked in, followed by Eddie. He heard the door slam shut behind them. 

“Jokes on them.” Richie mumbled. “My parents won’t give a shit.” 

“Well mine will. The one that’s alive anyways.” Eddie sighed, walking to the opposite side of where Richie was. 

“Dad or-” 

“Mom. And she’s a real bitch.”

Richie stayed silent because he didn’t know what to say. 

“I’m sorry, for the woods. I didn’t mean it. I was on edge and-” Eddie started. 

“It okay. I’m sorry, too. I didn’t know if you knew this but, I had no clue where we were. I should have listened to you.” 

“Maybe we could be friends.” 

“Oh, we will definitely be friends. Cause I’m-” 

“Mr. Extrovert.” Eddie finished and smiled at Richie, who in turn put on a fancy british accent and continued the bit. 

“Excuse me sir, please use my full name. Mr-Fucking-Extrovert, Mr. Extrovert was my father.” 

Eddie snorted. Just then, Richie realized how close they were. Eddie was practically on top of him. 

He took and chance and leaned in to Eddie. Thankfully, Eddie leaned back and their lips met. Before he even knew what was happening, Richie found himself making out with Eddie. Hard.  
Out of the corner of his eye he saw the same officer from earlier approaching the cell. 

“Hate to interrupt you two, but Eddie your mom is here.” Richie heard the door open and Eddie got off of him and walked out but not before turning around one more time and saying: 

“I’d rather get lost in the woods with you.”

**Author's Note:**

> feedback is always appreciated!


End file.
